GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY TO MAKE A CHOICE AGAIN OF MARRYING YOUR SPOUSE, WILL YOU STILL PICK HIM/HER? (2)

I just read a funny statement and it goes thus, “ The brain is the most outstanding thing in the world, it works 24hrs a day and 365 days a year, from your birth until you fall in Love” (Laughing), Isn’t it Funny that this is true for many people. Given the opportunity to choose my spouse again, I will say yes to him again and again and again. Y??? Like I said earlier, there are many ingredients that contribute to making a good soup sweet. You can’t mix water and salt only and expect to have a rich and good soup,( ko possible {as Yoruba’s will say}), The ingredients have to be complete, accurate and very good, not forgetting that the quantities may vary but they all come together , mix up and become a very scintillating  delicacy. In marriage, or even relationships, you don’t have to be treading on egg shells because of your spouse, that’s the first person that is supposed to know your first thought, You gotta be Naked and not ashamed with that person. Naked does not necessarily mean “bodily naked” but to bare your heart at any point to each other without thinking what the other person will say about you. Now, that’s true friendship in marriage.

Ingredient number 1: Set Loving and Realistic Rules for yourself, Rules again Right! – I can assure you that it works. Rules are guidelines set by a body in authority to checkmate actions and guide them a right to achieve a conducive environment and curtail excesses especially when dealing with Humans. Therefore, Rules are not made to break us or to make us tread on egg shells but to make Peace and maintain a cordial and respectful relationship which is very important in any Relationship. Remember, these rules have to be healthy, and objective. Examples of such rules are

·         whatever goes wrong we don’t have to shout on each other to proof the point”, “

·         we must not go to bed angry at each other, all wrongs or anger must be resolved before or at dinner” ‘

·         we must not involve a third party except when we agree we cannot resolve the issue between us”,

·         we must not drop calls on each other in the middle of a misunderstanding or due to anger”

And there could be so much more.

Rules are meant to guide us, to help us try and understand the other person’s point of view but majorly to curtail excesses due to human tendencies. Do not allow yourself to make excuses to break the Rules because once broken, will always be broken

Did You Notice that each of the Rules start with We? This is because both of you have to seat and make the decisions together and agree on what to and what not to.

GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY TO MAKE A CHOICE AGAIN OF MARRYING YOUR SPOUSE, WILL YOU STILL PICK HIM/HER

HMMM???  I guess this is must be a hard question for a lot of people but it is supposed to be a question that one should answer without even thinking. 

Marriage was meant to be a “Haven- A place of rest” for both man and woman. After work one day, I saw an office worker who normally when its 5’o”clock and I am rushing to leave the office, He relaxes as if it is not yet time to go home.  One day, he now decided to leave office at 5pm, I was so tripped that I had to ask him, “Mr. Praise, are you going home so early today?’ and concurring with my thought and assumption, he answered “am I crazy to be going home now? It’s still so early, I’ll go and hang out somewhere and get home later”.  Oh!!!, in my mind I sighed and it led me to the thought that Many marriages are suffering. Again, there are many instances I could go on and on about.

I am so sure that you are saying, I have heard a lot about marriage and all the tips to keeping it good what does she have to say? I would not plead with you to go on ahead and read, but if you have a thirst for enjoying your marriage then you would know that the smallest piece of information can change a whole lifetime.

I’d like to reiterate that MARRIAGE IS A RELATIONSHIP THAT WAS CREATED TO BE ENJOYED BETWEEN A MAN AND A WOMAN; it was intended to be a “HAVEN’. Marriage is BEYOND Sex.  Sex could be had between any man and any woman. It could be something and nothing at the same time most especially for promiscuous people.

Society has had its toll on the Man as a Person and on the Woman as well. I would like to Focus on the Woman Today: A woman MUST KNOW that she possesses Power! Power to do and undo, but she also has to know that the Power MUST be CHANELLED positively to have a happy home. Remember women are more prone to malice and negative thoughts and statements. She also MUST know that she was created to be a suitable HELP to her husband, Loving her husband may not necessarily be the issue here,, BUT Knowing HOW TO LOVE HIM is. Every Man is Different. Every Man has what keeps him off and what Trips him, she has to understand HER Man. (Smiling, am sure the Ladies are like, why do we have to be the ones doing most of the work, I’m Tired…lol). But I am asking do YOU understand his Love language or are you just laboring in Love and he doesn’t understand what you are doing???

Love is beautiful when well Nurtured

Love is beautiful depending on the effort and gathered experience and learning you gather and put at work in your life.
First of all, Your life as a teenager comes into play-
*What you saw your Parents do
*How you read meanings to their actions towards each other
*Your First Relationship
*Virginity (Whether you kept or lost it)
*Stuff you read constantly
*your Resolve

If you saw your Parents fight consistently and you never chose to programme your mind in a better direction, your Love life will be poor as part of it will believe that fighting or beating is a normal attribute for Love and in that case loose the essence of Love.
we gotta make a resolve to make things different, far different from what we saw our Parents do.
we need to agree that the 'fire' of Love will keep burning despite all odds, because there will definitely be odds, but how we handle them is what makes our Relationships stronger or poor.

Virginity is a topic that most people dont subscribe to, they think its an olden days pattern or norm, not Knowing that keeping and treasuring it helps to unravel a degree of Unity, exploration and unexplainable bond between two people in a marriage. alot of people have lost it and do not feel that there is no hope for you cos there is, U can decide to focus on what you have ahead of you not what is gone.
(To be Cont'd)

Is Love Real